Entry 53

53


(pages missing)

... heavy trucks, and other military paraphernalia. Some of the men on
them surely are not Russians, Letts, or Germans, or ...

(nine lines scratched out)

... I don't know whether it was Nachman's talk or the truth.

Anyhow I am going away, -- again alone -- alone forever. Damn life!
I cannot look backwards -- I feel sorry for my past; the present -- is
sufficiently bad not to speak of it; the future -- is just as dark -- as
this night. Not a star, not a single star.

The old man was taken to the People's Hospital this afternoon. He
thanked me.